When I was in ninth grade, my family moved across town to a big brown house that quickly became HOME. It was the kind of place that attracted other people, and over the years, we welcomed many honorary family members—often for a meal, sometimes for extended stays. One of the most frequent and consistent visitors was a kid named Jake who lived across the street. At the time we moved to the neighborhood, he was a second-grader like my youngest brother, Skipp.
On Saturday, I watched that curly-haired kid from across the street get married, and my “little” brother stood up for him, sporting long hair and a full beard in preparation for his epic Halloween costume (“The Dude” from The Big Lebowski). Now, I know that these guys aren’t really kids anymore—they are 27 and 28—but to me, they will always be those video-game-playing, Kool-Aid-drinking boys. And in my mind, I’m not really in my mid-thirties, my husband isn’t really turning 35 a month from now, and my mom isn’t really pushing 60. Right?
Am I the only one who finds this sort of thing—the passing of time at what feels like warp speed—alarming? I love this stage of my life, and it’s so cool to see my younger brothers and their friends turn into responsible young men, but the idea that five, ten, or fifteen years can fly by in the blink of an eye really freaks me out. I get nervous when older women—strangers—stop me in the grocery store to chat with my kids and tell me how quickly they’ll grow up. “Yes, I know,” I think. “It’s already happening!”
All of this is a good reminder to BE HERE NOW (a theme here lately, it seems). This weekend, the kid from across the street got married, but before I know it, my kids will be driving cars, leasing apartments, and maybe even getting hitched. It will probably feel like it happens quickly, yet there are many, many days between now and then—days with innumerable opportunitiesto soak up little moments and to live life BIG.
Last night, Josh and I took a sprightly bumblebee and a sleepy monkey out for their first tricks-or-treats. As we were driving home to spend the rest of the evening answering the door for trick-or-treaters, Linnea asked one of those simple yet priceless questions typical of two year olds.
“Can those kids chase me around in the grass?”
“Sorry, buddy,” I said, trying not to laugh. “It’s too dark outside for being chased in the yard, and we don’t really know those kids. But we can give them candy. Won’t that be fun?” She agreed to my plan, but not before asking about the chasing several more times. These are the days.
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I Want to Know
Are you in a time-is-moving-too-quickly phase of life right now or quite the opposite?
Are you a different age in your mind than you are in real life?
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I didn’t really feel ‘old’ until I found out Brian’s cousin (the one who was a FLOWER GIRL in our wedding…) was expecting a baby at the same time as us.
My older son (16) has always bragged about how glad he was to have young parents. I had him when I was 18. I’m wondering now if we have finally reached ‘old parent’ status. Will we be the ones with canes and walkers when our little ones cross the graduation stage? If so, I’m pimping that stainless steel out with glitter and bling.
Oh my goodness. Your FLOWER GIRL?! That would make me feel old, too!
Yeah, I always wanted to be a young mom, but it’s becoming more and more common to start later. It’s cool that you get to experience both!
When Cousin Harriet was asked about being in her 90s and the changes she had seen in almost a hundred years she would say she felt about 21 in her mind and those changes were gradual. She didn’t look around and say look what has changed.
Thanks for the reminder to be here now.
I love it! I hope that I still feel that young in my mind when I’m in my 90s!
Luckily, Grampa is planning to chase Linnie in the grass tomorrow afternoon.
Flow through time is just a weird thing. I know relativity is sort of shaky right now because of the whole neutrino thing, but it still works on the scale of life. Time is relative to the whole, and as we pile on more years, each one is a smaller fraction of the whole. I think that’s what the accelerating thing is all about. Now if we can just figure out HOW neutrinos can exceed the speed of life through the Earth…we’ll probably all disappear.
Deep Thoughts by Grampa Pete!
Yes! Time is absolutely flying! In my mind I’m still about 23 but with a lot more wisdom than what I had at the real 23.
Time seems to accelerate once you have kids of your own. But it’s funny because I still feel like I’m somewhere between 19-21 years old – my neighbor’s daughter is this age and I find myself talking to her like she is a peer or something! Then I remember, “Oh, I’m 35 years old!” I’m closer to her mother’s age than to her age!
I suppose I’d rather be a 35 year old woman that feels like she’s 21 instead of being 21 again! Many lessons have been learned in those 15-ish years of existence!
Yes! Oh, Lord, have I learned a lot since I was 21.